In the middle of the living room
by State Hopper
Summary: Following his return to Earth after Cell, Goku begins to question his place in the world. He had always known he was different, wrong in the head he decided. Did he regret any of it? No. Did he want a second chance? All the time. Yaoi-intentions, M-Trunks
1. Part I

_I am dbz outted, nothing, I own nothing, NOTHING ... such a damn shame._

**  
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE LIVING ROOM.  
Part 1**  
_ written by Naikora-AbB  
_

Above there was blue, below there was green and there in the middle of it all, was me. How I wished it black. It would be easier there, sitting in a corner and watching the world go by... going on by without me. To my right there was a boy. His body still growing and hands coming into frame. He smiled when the sun was high and I smiled to. Little did Gohan know that for the first time in my life I was thinking _'Enjoy today, because it may all be gone tomorrow'_

**A Few Days Earlier:**

It was barley a minute past 10:00am on the morning of May 23rd. Hailstorms had been forecast to arrive around noon, the darkness stalking like a cat. Swishing the tea dregs about my cup, Chichi cleared away the dishes. The imitation china chipping and clipping. There and back again, death was basically a theme. One more thing worth the risk. Besides the pain, it was fine. Nothing mattered when you were up there, a place where things were weightless and bewilderment your only worry. Nevertheless, when the memories came... death simply wasn't _dead_ enough.

From under my watch, Chichi's elbows move in and out as she cleaned, her dress shifting like an old woman's skin. We weren't so young anymore. It never really occurred to me until now. I had always known I was different, wrong in the head I guess. Grandpa never explained the harder things. Nowadays I wondered if he would have... If I asked... _Kami I missed him_. Staring out the window, I slumped in the old mahogany chair. One of a set. The wood was dull and worn. Barley held together but for a few tiny nails. It reminded me of certain other things, things which also were drifting, floating and fading away. The misleading notion was gone.

Outside Autumn leaves waltzed through the air, down and out from the fable. There were so many people to let down and yet no one to talk to. I felt rutted by it, cast out by my own disgrace. It was so much easier then. Prior the pact, former the story, before I was married and before Gohan. Did I regret any of it? _No_. Did I want a second chance? _All the time_. I could see that I was becoming like a stone, sitting at home for the air wear me down. I wanted that interruption, that release, simply that spell in which I would become something else, something detached. It was a poor excuse I know, but how the world distracted me, how they all did. Preceding May 23rd I meet a boy, three years gone, I saw a man, yet never once did I _know_ him. By no means did I think, _'There isn't much time'. _

Opening the door a voyager halted at the porch, allowing long hair to fall forward in greeting. He always looked as if in a world of his own, Kami I wanted those damn directions, the route in which I was to take. Rising my chin at him, we smiled, squinting a little at him, we just... _smiled._

"Hey Goku."

"Hello" four feet shifted.

"Dad's training downstairs, you want me to get him?"

"No no it's okay..." I hesitated "No ones that game" he laughed at me.

"Looks like some storm huh?" we both glanced to the East.

"I like storms."

"Hah..." the silence fell "You looking for Gohan?" Shaking my head he placed a hand against the door frame, as if to signal his want to be elsewhere. Timidly my lips parted and words formed in my head. I could feel them clambering up onto my tongue, _waiting, holding, building,_ merely to become, something lesser.

"Just a little bored I guess."

"Well... I'm not busy or anything. you wanna come in?" In a mindless fallacy I ascended the steps, wondering... _is in your head?_

Drifting down the hall, Trunks attained the movement of a python. Swaying like a willow branch in a trouble-free breeze, whilst all I could do was lumber. Stopping at the landing, which overlooked the lounge. Everything matched a jigsaw puzzle with memories strewn about like opinions. "I was looking through some old albums." he meekly shrugged. "Don't have them at home, ya know, burnt and gone."

"Right. Looking forward to going back?"

"Guess so." both eyes shifted. "You want a drink or something?" shaking my head we just stood there, in the middle of the living room.

"Trunks, can I ask you something" I took place at the sofa.

"Sure..."

"Do you _want_ to go home?" Switching off the television, he moved to the adjoining armchair.

"Of course I do." the tempest screamed outside "I miss mom a lot. She needs me and so does everyone else. I'm strong enough to destroy the androids now." I leaned out from my seat. "But... if you mean will I miss this time, yeah, sure. I'm ganna miss Dad a lot and Gohan and you." I knew there was no underlying message or hidden agenda, nevertheless I smiled.

"We'll miss you to. Things will work themselves out." the room became demonstrative "Hey! You'll still have the time machine right? So you can come back visit whenever you want." Reliving both eyes from the carpet, Trunks laughed lightly.

"That would be good."

"It sure would." Without due thought, I shook his knee like a child. The blue material rough against the smooth feel of flesh. Though my stomach lurched with anxiety, one thought couldn't help but course _'It sure would'._ Well, I either squeezed too hard or held him too long, for the young man gave me the oddest look - clear perplexingly tainted with a little distaste. Removing myself, he released a guarded breath. In spite of everything I didn't feel sorry, only... _happy_, in the strangest way. With a thunder crack our heads turned in silence. Staring toward the ceiling as if half expecting it to cave in.

"There goes the rain" I muttered with relief in distraction.

"Uh huh."

"I like the rain" I pointed out. "I also like lightening, Gohan doesn't, he said that it..."

"Goku?" Trunks interrupted.

"Yes..." Leaning forward the man stroked at his brow before pushing back.

"D-did you" he paused "Did you ever _ not _ do the right thing?" Cobalt eyes squinted as if attempting to blur the situation. "Did you ever want to?" Absently I ran a hand over my knee, failing to understand the bases to his question.

"What do you mean?" tighting his jaw for a second, I was looked at dead bang before dismissal.

"Nothing..." he gazed to the carpet. "I'm just talking... never mind." Witnessing his expression I shifted along the sofa.

"You alright?" Glancing toward the window pane he sighed. "You wanna say something? I'm good at keeping secrets... remember" He made a small sound, a low laugh I hoped.

"Yeah, I know I can trust you Goku. But it's okay." Trunks smiled and straightened in the seat. "It's not really important" As the clock struck 2pm I noticed that the rain had steadied, creating a dull hiss upon the roof. Yet all in all I wasn't paying much attention to the storm. Sighing aloud Trunks motioned outward for inevitably words began to spill. Adjusting myself upon the sofa the young man lowered his tone. A wave of pressure coming across in his voice. "I'd always known I was different, not right ya know" two hands wrung. "Mum's no idea. I can't tell her, I know she would be so disappointed. Maybe even a little angry. I hate to think of dad's opinion" he huffed in forced humor. "It's hard... sounds cliché but I wish I could be just like everyone else, it's tiring." With a meek reverberation my lips calmly parted, ultimately breaking the atmosphere.

"If you think Vegeta thinks less of you because of it your wrong. You tried to beat Cell with all you had, we all did." I smiled at him "Bulma wouldn't care, why are you so worried?" Trunks barley breathed for a good few seconds, his hair didn't even move. Squeezing both eyes the young man readily leaned forward with a beseeching expression.

"I'm not talking about Cell Goku." he rushed beneath his breath.

"Your not?"

"No..._I'm not_" Dropping his head for a moment, the mans breathing briefly juddered, w here upon the blue carpet white socks tapped and hands tightened. I didn't know what to say, I didn't know what was troubling him. I wanted to console Trunks with all my heart, to hold him close and whisper away the hurt. Wiping his eyes the young man turned away to the heat of embarrassment. Absently I rubbed my arm, shifting to grasp at his knee. Squeezing the item gently I gained a momentarily glance, before Trunks stared out with nothing above a ghost's unease.

"Trunks cheer up, I don't like seeing you this way."

"You don't?" patting his knee I shook my head.

"Of course not, you're my friend" Smiling weakly the young man nodded as wet breath erupted past his lips. The rain had stopped and wind had died, the storm all but gone. Releasing a heavy sigh my muscles tightened in retraction with thoughts of tomorrow.

"Wait...Goku" his voice stressed to create pressure about my hand. Snatching his touch from mine, the young man sat back down. "Sorry, I mean, sure you can't stay longer?"

_to be continued..._

* * *


	2. Part II

**IN THE MIDDLE OF THE LIVING ROOM**  
**Part 2**  
_ written by Naikora-AbB_

Tomorrow he would be gone and in the gloom of winter clouds; time was a hard thing to keep. Yet what time was there to lose...but to be gladly lost with him. Clearing the happiness from my throat I sat back down "Okay." I gestured "I'll stay." smiling, the young man leaned back into his chair. Causing the material across his chest to tighten waywardly. For the first time in a long span of..._always_. I barely had the energy. Certain traits worn to nothing by the sham brooding in my mind. All I wanted was for the quandary to die, to battle the wall, the words, knowing undeniably, that for once it was for me.

"Goku..." I looked up "Who taught you?"

"... in schooling?"

"N-no" his hair swayed "I mean fighting, who was your master?"

"Oh... Well that was Master Roshi." I replied.

"Ah." he paused "Well...did I ever tell you that Gohan trained me?" I nodded "Hum...It's weird." he sat back "I know he doesn't know me...I mean not how I remember him. But in a way that doesn't really matter, you know" shoulders rose and fell "I like being able to ask him things again...silly huh" my head shook. I often wondered if it comforted him, being in the company of so many ghosts. Was it as real as he had hoped? Like a fresh minute he was a strange and foreign thing, simeply striving to become familiar.

"I wish I could've been there. In your time" I finally responded.

"Been there? Hey man you can't fight something like a virus, and anyway you've been helping here. This timeline's been an experience that's for sure." he swayed.

"... and now it's over"

"Yeah, till the next time that is" It wasn't so much unpleasant, as it was at times unwelcoming. But today in the Briefs living room, silence was a wonderful and chastely thing. Rubbing my arm I turned to watch a tree by the window. Our attention briefly adverted as three bulbs flickered, the lightening was once again upon us.

"Have you and Chichi always been together?" words tugged.

"Gees... yeah, I guess you could say that."

"That's a long time." he stated "It's nice that you're both still happy together."

"Yeah…" Swelling and slouching, I brewed those dark and deep misgivings where strange fingers flexed. I didn't know how to handle myself in a field of impatience. Formerly those desires had been stored in the back closet, ultimatly thought to be thrown out. Yet nowadays little by little they were beginning to claw their way back, and I hated my very heart for it. Chichi was the world to me.

"You must have been really young when you got married" he muttered.

"We were" insight crawled... "But weren't." and reached... "We'd been through a lot together" Trunks listened "But they were things that didn't really help at home"

"What things?"

"Fighting, how to fight." falling back, my voice fractured the floodgate. Sending those dilemmas out into nothingness...drown Goku, drown, drown, down and down.

"You're happy though?" I gave a glance.

"We're fine."

"Yeah" he paused "But you're happy?" Thinking of the road home, I ended back so small, so much less. A broken idea; a broken depiction; a muddled life. "Goku?" he said softly, I had nothing to reply with. "You can be sad sometimes, I am, and no bodies laughing," his weight sunk into the seat beside me. "For a long time I couldn't see past Gohan's death. But I found that life is life, okay" He leaned forward. "We get through it, we have to... the hardest thing is to just be here." he smiled "It's easier if you know that. Right?" My eyes hurt, close the darn flood gate, bring it all back in...bring it back before I...

"Things are going wrong" words weakly faltered. "I don't know what's up?"

"What things?" Trunks whispered.

"Umph..." the gale grew "I have thoughts sometimes...hn..." eyes dipped "All the time..."

"Thoughts?"

"I can't say" my back tensed.

"What thoughts?"

"I can't tell you. Everything would change. I can't, I'm sorry."

"Yes you can...I'm not much of a stool pigeon you know," he laughed lightly, stopping to talk further. "It helps to say things out loud. It makes them realized"

"Exactly why I don't. I feel sick even thinking about them all knowing." my voice pawed through the hardest thing. "...it isn't okay"

"Goku I'm being serious.." he lowered.

"Please don't be mad with me, or tell."

"I won't..." Trunks reinforced. Looking away... I imploded.

"Those wrong thoughts I have..." my stomach flipped "those thoughts... they're about people... m-men." Like wind upon water, it all went quiet. Holding that moment as it sung over me, never breaking, never breaching, walking so fast that it simply slipped through the world, where faces passed me by. No names, no opinions, no worries, I wish it could all be that easy. "I know,_ I know_..."

"Your kidding right?" Twisting my eyes to him, the man rushed out the strangest expression "I tried to tell you"

"What?" I stared.

"Before." he gestured "I tried to tell you what you just told me. But things came out wrong, I couldn't explain" it all returned from flight.

"But?" fingers burned "...your like me, you notice them to?"

"No Goku... not men" he smiled before replying. "...just one"

"What?" he looked back at me "Who?"

"Who else..." With something nobody could explain I mistreated the road home. Dropping the map, forgetting the faces and longing to cave in. Hurriedly warmth grew like a child and hands fumbled with haste and hurry. Hauling in, my gi was crumpled against him.. "Goku..." breath increased. Crushing both lips to mine, butterflies swept like wild fire. Finding any one concave to sear. Enfolding, Trunks pressed himself deeper and deeper, until I felt nigh on submerged.

"Umph..." I heaved out anxiously, unsure of my direction. Closing both eyes material gathered, whilst hips dug to induce the air sultry. Outside judgment peered through the glass, sneering via tiny eyes which sat in rightious branches. Breaking our kiss, Trunks rested his brow to mine, letting the weight fall and reasons linger.

"Please..." He whispered as lips sunk into the sweeps, craze in skin and spirit.

"Trunks..." I heaved out. Gasping with alarm as regretful gusto wound round and round. Strumming older ribs the entire spread of me throbbed with need growing further. Yet even so, I wished to run like a rabbit. Pressing against me harder, Trunks upheaval was realized. The rush in words and action not so different. "No..." I grit weakly "Trunks...stop..." Again I was kissed, and again he hugged, earning the calm.

"...I really do like you." he whispered, "I do...I'm not just doing this cause it's nice." Looking onward, his head rose and fell as I respired. Both arms hugging to pull my chest closer. It was a strange moment, a peculiar few minutes. For even within this fresh intimacy, all I could think of was _Gohan_. So abruptly had this man melted from a desire, to simply become, a child. One which happened to be hugging me, wordlessly asking for approval and perhaps just a little love.

"I know you like me..." I whispered, "I know you do" Stroking back his hair, the removal quietly uncovered a weary slumber. The song of him playing out like a bell in my head. "I'm sorry for bringing all this out" I mubbled "I'm sorry we could not have talked sooner." Rubbing his shoulder, the weight of him was nice. Not offensive, or sexual...just nice. Reliving my mind of everything, words and faces rolled behind the day. Embracing him softly, affection engulfed as sleep came in. Parading about as if the finest death.

_Beneath the giant willow trees. Two even faces stared. Lilac butterflies surrounding one and blue grass, the other. Striking an opposing jaw, Blue blade kicked Lilac butterfly to the ground. Striking one more time before the sky turned black. I was but three feet tall, my hands tiny and voice ten times less. Coughing out white feathers, Lilac butterfly covered his face. "_Nothings ever goes right_" he cried. The multi colored swirl in his eyes, turning silver as enhanced blood fell. Hitting the ground, he stiffened like a stone. My feet were the heaviest things. Rolling both shoulders Blue blade grabbed Lilac Butterfly by the head, pulling him to the pit. "_I have no son_!" eyes narrow to turn animalistic, mocking another man "_Thanks to you Goku! Goku? _GOKU!"_

"Trunks..." he stared down at me "What time is it?" Placing himself back upon the sofa with a glass of water, we both glanced toward the bookcase.

"Six PM..." Outside, dusk had sent a wonderful haze across the curtains. Storm clouds rolling over the western ranges. The house was warm, and to my surprise yet appreciation, lacking in both Vegeta and Bulma. Resting both elbows at his knees, the young man who had hugged me stared across with gratifying expression , where, like I had always hoped, he began to enlighten me to the mystry of that was..._ him._

**THE END**

>> _Thanks for reading!_


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